Dorothy\'s Mystical Adventures in Oz

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Copyright (C) 2003 by Robert J. Evans.

Xlibris Publishing.
You may order this book from the special order desk at
your book store. ISBN No. 0-7388-2254-X(Hardcover).
or ISBN No. 0-7388-2255-8 (Softcover)
You can also order directly from the publisher.

Dorothy's Mystical

Adventures in Oz

By

Robert J. Evans

This book is dedicated
L. Frank baum, who was the
first mortal to discover
The marvelous land of Oz --
and to my son, Robert Jr.,
whose love of Oz inspired
this story.

Contents

1. Market Day

2. Dorothy Reminisces on Oz

3. Dorothy Returns to Oz

4. The Pinheads

5. A Visit From The Wicked Witch of The Deep South

6. The Dainty Land of China

7. The Girrephalumps

8. Lion Country

9. The Mission Begins

10. A Philosophical Discussion

11. Octapongland

12. The Fuzzy Yellow Wogglebugs

13. Princess Saari's Colorland

14. Tickleland

15. Elfland

16. Thoughtformland

17. Americanindianland

18. UFOland

19. Americanpresidentland

20. Captured

21. A Surprising Reversal

22. A Political Discussion

23. At last, The Emerald City

*

Chapter One:

Market Day

*

It was a warm summer morning. Dorothy was sitting out on the front
porch, gently rocking back and forth in Aunt Em's rocking chair. Toto,
her little dog, lay sleepily at her feet. Aunt Em and Uncle Henry were
hustling and bustling inside the house, getting ready to go to market.
"Oh, Dorothy ..." called Aunt Em.
No answer.
"Dorothy, do you hear me?"
Still no answer.
Aunt Em marched out on the porch. Toto, sensing trouble, scampered off,
while Dorothy -- hearing Aunt Em's heavy footsteps, turned to see what
the commotion was.
Needless to say, Aunt Em did not look too pleased. She stood in front of
Dorothy with her hands firmly planted on her hips.
"What is the matter with you, child? Didn't you hear me calling?"

"I'm sorry, Auntie Em."

"Were you sleeping?"

"Oh no, I wasn't asleep, Auntie. But ... well I was kind of thinking
about things, and ... well ..."

Just then, Uncle Henry appeared. He was struggling with his collar.

"Would you help me with this, Em?" he asked.

"Just a minute, Henry," his wife answered.

She spoke sharply to the girl. "I'm afraid I don't understand you these
days."

Dorothy looked up at her aunt with her big brown eyes. A hint of a tear
appeared.

"I've tried to explain to you, Auntie."

Aunt Em just shook her head. "Now, I don't want to hear any more of your
tall tales, Dorothy. Not right now."

"We're running late, Em," interrupted Uncle Henry.

"All right," answered his wife. She turned back her niece. "You'd better
hurry and get yourself ready, young lady. We'll talk about this later."

Dorothy started to leave, then hesitated for a moment. "Auntie Em, could
I stay home today?"

Aunt Em looked surprised, for Dorothy usually looked forward to market day.

"Are you feeling poorly?" she asked, putting her hand on the girl's
forehead.

"I'm just a little tired," Dorothy replied weakly. "I don't think I'm
quite up to walking around all day."

Aunt Em looked again at Uncle Henry who just shrugged his shoulders.

"Well ... all right," said Aunt Em. "But I want you to rest. Now, don't
leave the house. We'll be home around eight, I expect."

After Dorothy went inside, Aunt Em began to help Uncle Henry with his
collar. He could see by the expression on Aunt Em's face that she was
very much concerned.

"Aw, don't worry, Em," he said. "The girl's been through quite an
ordeal, with that twister an' all. She'll be fine bye an' bye. She just
needs plenty of rest."

"But she looks so pale," replied Aunt Em. "And what about the strange
stories?"

"You mean about Oz?" asked Uncle Henry.

"Yes, Oz." Aunt Em replied. "How did she ever think up such a name?"

"It does seem strange," agreed Uncle Henry.

"And what about all the funny characters she says live there?" continued
Aunt Em. "A talking scarecrow and lion, and a tin woodman of all things
-- not to mention a wicked witch! That must be where her mind is; it's
certainly not here in Kansas."

"Now, Em," said Uncle Henry, "don't fret so. Dr. Gabriel told us not to
worry, that she's temporarily confusing her dreams with reality --
something to do with that bump on the head, he said. She'll come out of
it; she'll be her old self in no time -- you'll see."

Meanwhile, Dorothy decided she'd best do as her aunt had said, so she
went into her room and lay down on the bed to rest. She was just
drifting off when she heard the sound of horse hooves outside. She
quickly got up and waved from her window as Aunt Em and Uncle Henry
drove by in the wagon.

"Now don't wait up for us, Dorothy," called Aunt Em. "And be sure to get
plenty of rest!"

"I will, Auntie," called Dorothy. "Have a good time!"

Just then, Toto jumped through the window into the girl's arms. She
fussed over him as she carried him back to her bed. The little dog
curled up at her feet and went to sleep.

*

Chapter Two:

Dorothy Reminisces on Oz

*

As Dorothy rested, she thought about Aunt Em and Uncle Henry, and how
upset they were with her for daydreaming so much. But with the reality
of her Oz adventures so fresh in her mind she could not help but dwell
on them.

A smile came over her face as she recalled the first time she met the
Scarecrow, and how surprised she was when he first spoke to her. When he
said he did not have any brains she agreed to take him with her to the
Emerald City to ask the Great Oz to give him some. Of course, as it
turned out, the Scarecrow did have a brain after all. But, because he
did not believe that he did, the Great Oz had to go through the motions
of presenting him with one.

Then there was the Tin Woodman: Dorothy and the Scarecrow were greatly
surprised when they first came across him in the forest. He was standing
perfectly motionless with an uplifted ax in his hands. Apparently, he'd
been caught in a rainstorm and had rusted solid. After Dorothy had found
an oil-can and oiled his joints, he was just fine. She recalled how
anxious he was to accompany them when he found out their destination,
for he insisted that he did not have a heart, and was certain that the
Great Oz could provide him with one.

Just then, a slight breeze blew at the curtains, awakening the girl out
of her dream-like state. She sat up and looked at Toto. He was still
sound asleep. She lay back again as her mind drifted back to when the
brave little dog tried to defend her and her friends from the Cowardly
Lion. It had scared them all half to death when they heard the terrible
roar as the Lion bounded into the road in front of them. Of course, they
did not know he was cowardly at the time. That is, until Dorothy punched
him in the nose for attacking her little dog. Then he cried like a baby.
When he found out about their mission, he asked if he, too, could
accompany them in the hopes that he would be able to obtain courage from
the great magician. Needless to say, he was a welcome addition to the
little group.

The Lion actually proved himself to be quite brave during their journey;
but like the Scarecrow and the Tin Woodman, he thought he needed the
magical powers of Oz to give him what he felt he lacked.

Reliving her recent adventures in Oz caused Dorothy to feel quite
restless. She missed her friends terribly.

She got up again and walked over to the window. The room grew dark as
rainclouds gathered. A summer thunderstorm seemed imminent. She closed
the window and shivered as she recalled the Wicked Witch of the West.
She couldn't imagine her to be cowardly in the least. Perhaps people
like her were mean because no one loved them. If that were true, their
bitter attitude only made matters worse. Well, thank goodness the witch
was dead. It seemed wrong to wish someone dead, but the Land of Oz was
well rid of her for she had brought fear and misery to everyone who came
into contact with her. The little Munchkins were no longer afraid now
that she was gone, and could enjoy a peaceful life once more.

"Even outside of Oz," thought Dorothy, "there are certain leaders who
keep their people in fear." She wondered how they had behaved when they
were children.

She began to think of her friends again. She could not help but wonder
how they were and what they were doing right now.

She thought of Aunt Em and Uncle Henry. How /could/ they disbelieve her
story? It made her sad to think that no one believed her. It couldn't
have all been a dream -- of that she was sure. Everything was so real and
vivid in Oz. All the events that occurred there couldn't have been her
imagination. Why, even the colors of the flowers were ten times more
intense than in Kansas. The flowers in her garden -- pretty as they were
-- couldn't compare. They seemed faded in comparison. In fact, Kansas
seemed faded in comparison.

A strange thought suddenly occurred to her: What if Oz was the real
world, and Kansas but a shadowy dream world? Oz her real home and Kansas
just a place she was somehow visiting in her dreams...? No, that
couldn't be. Aunt Em and Uncle Henry and the others were all a very real
part of her life. But then, the Scarecrow, Tin Woodman and Lion were all
a part of her life, too. And so were the Munchkins, the Good Witch of
the North, and Glinda -- even the Wicked Witch of the West. They were all
as real as anyone

in Kansas.

A feeling of utter confusion came over her. "Oh no, what if I can't
distinguish between the real and the unreal?"

*

Chapter Three:

Dorothy Returns to Oz

*

Dorothy's head began to throb. She wondered if the injury that she
suffered during the tornado had caused some permanent damage. A feeling
of extreme dizziness came over her. She walked over to her bed and lay
down again.

As she lay back, the room began to spin. Had she been standing she was
sure she would have fallen. She imagined she could hear a voice inside
her head telling her she must return to Oz. Suddenly it appeared that
the floor gave way as she felt herself falling ... falling ... twisting
and turning over and over as she fell. She began spinning around very
fast. Her body felt like it was being torn apart. "Oh, no!" she cried.
"What is happening to me? Please! Someone! Help me!"

The thought raced through her mind that she was being sucked into a huge
vortex by a great evil force. A tremendous fear filled her heart. She
visualized the leering faces of a hundred wicked witches swirling around
her. The faces were cackling with loud screams of hideous laughter. A
hundred pairs of ugly hands with long bony fingers clutched at her as
she fell.

"Now we've got you!" screamed the witches in unison. "You'll never get.
away from us this time, little Goody-Two-Shoes!"

"Help me, someone. Please help!" Dorothy cried.

As she called out for help, the witches' images began to fade; the
screaming to diminish. In their place a shining metallic substance
appeared. It spun around her so fast it seemed like a solid sheet of
metal. Whatever it was, it appeared to slow her fall.

Gradually, the spinning object slowed. As it did, her image was
reflected each time it passed in front of her. Suddenly she saw two
dangling arms and legs attached to the spinning form, and a shiny face
grinning at her.

"Nick Chopper!" she cried, recognizing the Tin Woodman and lunging
toward him with her arms outstretched.

CLUNK! There was a dull thud as the soft material of her body made
contact with the woodman's metal body. They both fell the last few feet
to the ground, laughing uproariously.

"You know," Dorothy said, when their laughter subsided, "before I
realized who you were, I kept seeing my face reflected as you spun by
me. It is reflected now on your chest, right where your heart is."

"Oh, Dorothy!" said the Tin Woodman, starting to cry. "I'm so happy to
see you."

"Now don't you cry," said Dorothy, wiping his eyes with her
handkerchief, "you'll rust up again."

"It's wonderful to have a heart," the Tin Woodman said, "and to have all
the feelings that a human has; but a heart can grow very heavy when
someone you love has to go away. Of course, it enables you to be filled
with joy when they return. That is why I am crying, because I am so happy."

"I know how you feel," replied Dorothy, her own eyes beginning to mist.
She held him tightly for a long time.

"Well," said the Tin Woodman at length, "how would you like a nice cup
of tea?"

"That would be lovely," answered the girl.

"Then let us adjourn to my castle," he replied.

As they walked, each brought the other up to date on the latest
developments in their lives.

"After you returned to Kansas, Dorothy, everyone settled down to their
usual routine. It was wonderful with the Wicked Witches of the East and
West gone. And with fear no longer a part of everyone's lives. Oz was
the happiest place in all creation."

"Was the happiest?" questioned the girl. "Isn't Oz a happy place now?"

The Tin Woodman was about to answer when they arrived at the castle.
"Let me put the kettle on and I'll continue with my story," he said.

While the tin man was in the kitchen, there was a knock at the door.
"Would you get that?" he called to Dorothy. "It's probably the Scarecrow."

Dorothy ran to the door excitedly. Sure enough, it was her old friend.
When he saw Dorothy, he threw his arms around her. "Oh, Dorothy," he
said. "How wonderful to see you!"

At that, the Tin Woodman entered the room with Dorothy's tea. The
Scarecrow stared at him with a questioning look. "Is Dorothy going to
help us again?" he asked. "Help you?" said Dorothy. "Why, what do you
mean? What has happened?"

"Let us sit down while you have your tea," motioned the Tin Woodman.
"I'll explain everything."

As Dorothy sipped her tea she wondered what terrible things could
possibly have occurred since she left.

The Tin Woodman looked at Dorothy rather seriously. "Do you remember
when you first arrived in Oz and your house fell on the Wicked Witch of
the East and killed her dead? And how angry the Wicked Witch of the West
was?"

Dorothy nodded. She remembered only too well ... especially when the
magical Silver Shoes were given to her by the Good Witch of the North.
The Wicked Witch of the West couldn't contain herself; she was
absolutely furious. First her sister killed, then the Silver Shoes
stolen from right under her nose!

"Well," continued the Tin Woodman, "there was a third sister; the Wicked
Witch of the Deep South. She heard about all this just before you left
Oz. Then, after you returned to Kansas, the news reached her that you'd
thrown water over her favorite sister -- the Wicked Witch of the West,
and liquidated her. Oh, was she angry! She was livid! And when she found
out you'd escaped from Oz she screamed so loudly that her false teeth
fell out and all the Munchkins fell down laughing. That really made her
mad. She screamed at the Munchkins and told them if you ever come back
to Oz you can kiss yourself goodbye, because you'll never see yourself
again."

"What a horrible thing to say!" exclaimed Dorothy. "What a terrible
person she must be."

"Oh, she is," said the Scarecrow. "She's worse than the Wicked Witches
of the East and West put together. It's a good thing you left Oz when
you did. Even the Silver Shoes would not have been strong enough to stop
her."

Dorothy was about to speak when a familiar figure walked through the
open door . It was Glinda, the Good Witch of the South. The girl ran to
her friend and hugged her.

"How wonderful to see you again," said Glinda, holding Dorothy tightly
to her. "We all missed you terribly when you returned to Kansas."

"I missed all of you, too," replied Dorothy. "More than I can say."

"But why have you returned so soon?" asked Glinda. "I know you longed to
be with your family again."

"I don't really know why I've returned," replied the girl. "It's true I
miss my friends, but it's more than that. Some strange pull has brought
me back. I even heard a voice asking me to return. Does that sound bizarre?"

"I think I understand," said Glinda. "You see, there is a Supreme
Intelligence in Oz. It is a highly creative force which is spiritual in
nature. This force knows all things, and wants only good to prevail.
This was the voice you heard."

Dorothy nodded as Glinda continued: "This force cannot of itself make
changes. It can only prod, and try to make contact with those that are
given to evil ways. When this contact is not possible, it becomes
necessary for mortal intervention. That is why you have been called. To
try to bring the Wicked Witch of the Deep South to a higher
understanding. I myself have tried and failed."

"But what can I do?" asked the girl. "If you, a very powerful witch,
cannot make her give up her evil ways, what hope have I?"

"You have a very special power," said Glinda. "Also, this Intelligence --
otherwise known as the Great Wizard -- is about to bestow the essence of
His wisdom on you. Actually, he is merely unlocking your own inner
wisdom. You will gradually become aware of this. The words you speak
during this particular excursion to Oz will reflect this wisdom. It is
hoped this will bring enlightenment to the witch, as well as others. Do
you feel guilty about killing her sisters?"

"No," replied Dorothy. "I do not. In both cases it was an accident. It
wasn't my fault that the cyclone picked up my house and dropped it on
the Wicked Witch of the East. And as far as the Wicked Witch of the West
was concerned, I was furious that she stole my shoe. That's why that I
threw a bucket of water over her. But how was I to know the water would
melt her down to a puddle? I was sorry I destroyed her at first, but
later quite relieved. I believe she would have killed us all."

After a moment's contemplation, the girl continued, "Of course, being
the cause of someone's death is nothing to be proud of. But since it
happened anyway, Oz is a lot happier place for it."

"Yes, and because of that," said Glinda, "the Munchkins think of you as
their Queen. Their wish is for you to stay in Oz forever and rule all of
Munchkin Country."

"Oh, I couldn't stay in Oz forever!" exclaimed Dorothy. "I mean, I'm
most honored that they want me to be their Queen; but much as I love
this beautiful Land of Oz and all my friends here, I love Kansas and
Aunt Em and everyone else too."

"Well, as it happens," said Glinda, "your life is in mortal danger. The
Wicked Witch of the Deep South is not playing games. Even as we speak
she is scheming up the most horrible things. She is in no mood to give
up her evil ways, I'm afraid."

"Well, I won't be pushed around by her," said Dorothy emphatically.
"Tomorrow we will find the Lion and make our plans."

Glinda nodded her head and put her hand on Dorothy's shoulder. "You're a
brave girl," she said. "I'm very proud of you. I'll be standing by to
help in any way I can."

Glinda departed.

"You go on to bed, Dorothy," said the Scarecrow. "We'll get things ready
for our journey." Dorothy yawned as she bid her friends goodnight. "I am
awfully tired," she said. "And we do have a long journey ahead of us."
The Scarecrow had previously made a most comfortable bed up for her. She
fell asleep almost as soon as her head touched the pillow.

*

Chapter 4:

The Pinheads

*

The following morning, bright and early, Dorothy and her friends started
out for the forest where the Cowardly Lion lived. The Lion had stayed
there to help all the animals who lived in the forest to fight a fierce
monster, and was now King of the Beasts.

"Perhaps we should order a Pinhead river and raft to take us as far as
the Dainty China Country," said the Scarecrow.

"But I can't swim," replied the Tin Woodman. "What if I fall overboard?"

"Oh, don't worry about that," said the Scarecrow. "Pinhead rivers are
only a couple of feet deep. The worst that can happen to you if you fall
in the water is a rusty joint or two."

"Well, I'd better pack my oil-can then," replied the Tin Woodman seriously.

"The Pinheads," explained the Scarecrow, turning to Dorothy, "are almost
an extinct breed. You'll find them very interesting. The few that are
left live in a small village nearby."

Dorothy looked completely perplexed. "But order a river? You mean you
can order a river on demand? Just like that?"

"Just wait and see," replied the Scarecrow, with a knowing grin.

As they approached the Pinheads' village, a few Pinhead children ran out
to meet them. Dorothy could see why were called Pinheads. Their heads
really were the size of a pin, and when they spoke, their voices were
high and squeaky.

"Have you come for R and R?" squeaked one of the Pinhead children.

"R and R?" questioned Dorothy, "You mean rest and recreation?"

With that all the pinhead children burst into a fit of high squeaky
laughter.

"That's river and raft," explained the Scarecrow, trying to ease
Dorothy's obvious embarrassment. "The Pinheads make their living from
supplying rivers and building rafts." Then, turning to the Pinhead
child, he asked, "How much will it cost?" Just then some adult Pinheads
approached.

"That depends," said a Pinhead male who appeared to be their leader.

"Depends on what?" asked the Scarecrow.

"On whether or not you have a pin cushion," the leader replied. "If you
do, the R and R will be free."

"Well, I don't have one," said the Scarecrow.

"And neither do I," said the Tin Woodman.

"I have one!" exclaimed Dorothy, digging into her purse. "But what on
earth do you want a pin cushion for?"

"Well, as you can see," replied the Pinhead," our feet are pointed; and
since we sleep standing up, pin cushions make wonderful beds. We just
hold our feet tightly together and jump onto the pin cushion and sink
down to our heads. It is so cozy and warm, you wouldn't believe it."

"I don't understand how that can be," said Dorothy. "I know you are not
very big, but this pin cushion seems far too small for you to stand on,
let alone sink down to your head."

"Oh, that's not a problem for us," replied the Pinhead. "You see, we
have the ability to make little things big. How do you think we could
make a big raft for you giants? We just make the raft out of
match-sticks and thread, and when it's enlarged it looks like it's made
out of big logs and rope."

"But how do you do that?" exclaimed the girl.

"Oh, that's easy," replied the Pinhead. "You see, after the object is
made, we look at it under our big magnifying glass. This magnifying
glass is no ordinary magnifying glass, but has the ability to magnify
things permanently. It was given to our ancestors by a male witch who
had no further use for it."

"Why don't you look at each other's heads with it?" asked the Scarecrow
seriously. "Then you'd all have bigger heads."

"Oh, it won't work on living things," replied the Pinhead. "Besides, we
like the way we look. How would it be if everyone in Oz looked the same?
All skinny or all fat, all tall or all short, all white or all yellow,
all blue or all green, all --"

"All right, all right! You've made your point," said the Scarecrow. "My
brain is fairly new and it's just not used to thinking that much yet."

"I agree with you, Mr. Pinhead," said Dorothy. The world would be a very
dull place if everyone looked the same. Imagine what it would be like if
everyone looked exactly alike, thought exactly alike, and talked exactly
alike! There would be no point to existence."

"My sentiments entirely!" said the Pinhead.

"Getting back to the business at hand," said Dorothy. "I'm still
mystified as to how you create a river to order?"

"Well," answered the Pinhead. "It's quite simple, really. We have this
huge reservoir that was created by building a dam to capture the tears
of a giant that was a bit of a cry-baby, to say the least. The slightest
little hurt would set him off on a crying spell. We turned his excessive
crying into a cottage industry by utilizing the stored up tears for our
new company, /Rivers on Demand, Inc.,/ and since the tears have magical
qualities we can direct the river to and fro', uphill or downhill,
exactly as we wish to suit the customer's order. The river even knows to
avoid dwelling places and other inhabited areas, and to return
immediately to the reservoir when its passengers have disembarked."

"Remarkable!" replied Dorothy. "Just remarkable."

With that, they all went down to the newly created river to board the
raft that had just been completed for them. After stepping aboard they
barely had time to wave goodbye to their new friends as the river
quickly whisked them on their way.

*

Chapter Five:

A Visit from the Wicked Witch of the Deep South

*

"My, the river's flowing fast. I'm glad it's not that deep," said the
Tin Woodman, after they were underway. "If it were, and I fell
overboard, I could rust up solid for all eternity. Do you think the raft
will stay big? Oh dear, what if it gets little again? We'll all be
spilled into the water!"

"Don't worry so much," said Dorothy, smiling. "You'll worry yourself to
death."

"Can people really do that?" asked the Tin Woodman. "Worry themselves to
death?"

"Of course not," laughed the girl. "But I suppose a person could become
quite sick if he constantly worried over things."

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